Experiments in prayer

My congregation is in the middle of its worship series entitled, “Experiments in Kingdom Living”. We’re studying Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, and attempting to put his teachings into action in a manner similar to the one that Mark Scandrette outlines in his new book, Practicing the Way of Jesus.

One of the things that I’ve been learning throughout this series is a new appreciation of the prayer that Jesus taught his disciples to pray. Many people are familiar with it. In Matthew’s gospel, it reads like this:

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.
Your kingdom come. Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And do not bring us to the time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one.

Matthew 6.9-13

In our experiments, we’re trying to experience a new way of living — one that is Christ-like and rooted in discipleship. That new way of living is tied to a new way of thinking*, and that way of thinking was taught to Jesus’ disciples in the Lord’s Prayer. In this short prayer, we seem to find references to the entire Sermon on the Mount, if we look for it.

Scandrette talks about this in his book**. As they read the gospels, Scandrette and his community wanted a way to simplify all of the different teachings that they found. They identified five broad themes which seemed to encapsulate the individual instructions that Jesus gave to the disciples:

1) Identity
2) Purpose
3) Security
4) Community
5) Freedom and peace

And these themes are mirrored in the five lines of the Lord’s Prayer, as I’ve formatted it above.

Those of us who have memorized this prayer may have a tendency to recite it without thinking. After all, there is a good chance that we’ve been saying it since we were children. Throughout this worship series, the experiment that seems to be transforming me most is an intentional, deliberate, and conscious practice of prayer – learning the Lord’s Prayer again for the first time.

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* Which comes first: Christ-like thinking or Christ-like living? Talk amongst yourselves.

** Practicing the Way of Jesus by Mark Scandrette, pp. 64-67.

Sometimes God amazes us: congregational consensus

Twenty-eight months ago, I wrote that my community was in pain. Like many other Mennonite congregations, we were struggling to relate to our LGTBQ brothers and sisters, and a congregational meeting had just ended badly.

‘Badly’ is an understatement.

Somehow we managed not to split the congregation. Unfortunately, many people were devastated. Many people left. As for me, the months that followed were some of the hardest that I’ve experienced in church life. My emotional trauma made me physically ill when I was in worship. Congregational meetings were even worse.

Sometimes you pray; sometimes you cry and groan and let the Holy Spirit do the praying for you. In the midst of our pain, we managed to seek the help of KIPCOR, an organization devoted to conflict resolution. During the last two years, three different individuals from KIPCOR have helped us to work at reconciliation; to process what the congregation wanted to do about membership for LGBTQ individuals; and to find ways to continue to be church together despite opinions and beliefs that were all over the map.

Personal healing was not easy, but in some ways it was very straightforward. I knew that I needed to be reconciled to some people, and I intentionally (and successfully) worked at that. Perhaps more importantly, there was bitterness hiding deep inside me, and a very important dialogue circle facilitated by KIPCOR helped to get rid of that. That’s a story that I’ve written before.

But what about congregational healing? The questions about who’s in and who’s out aren’t unique to my congregation, and the stories generally aren’t pretty. If you go to the Mennonite or Mennonite-related publications, you’ll discover that the whole denomination is struggling. And of course, it’s not just Mennonites. This story is constantly repeating itself right now within the “Church-with-a-capital-C”.

At the urging of KIPCOR, we entered into a discernment and consensus building process. Consensus sounds a little crazy, given the deep divisions in the congregation, but it’s useful to be clear about what consensus is, and what it is not. This description comes from KIPCOR:

Consensus is a process for making a group decision without voting. A group reaches consensus when all members agree upon a single alternative and each group member can honestly say:

“I believe that you understand my point of view and that I understand yours. Whether or not I prefer this decision, I support it because 1) it was reached fairly and openly, and 2) it is the best solution for us at this time.”

Consensus is not unanimity. Consensus is about consent. Group members can agree to accept a proposal and still not all feel the same about it. This is because within any group, there are levels of agreement (or consent) that range from strong support to strong opposition.

In our recent congregational meetings, we’ve described our support for ideas and proposals on a five-point scale. A ’5′ indicates full support. The amount of support decreases down through a ’2′, where one has serious concerns but would still consent to the decision. A ’1′ indicates that a person does not give consent for something to proceed. Those who are “at a 1″ are always asked to provide information on what could be changed to make something better.

We have spent time – a long time now - generating ideas and refining them, trying to seek a solution to our membership quandary and our desire to continue to be church. Last month, we had a meeting where we seemed to be focusing in on one particular proposal. It involved two parts. First, we would shift the way we think about congregational membership, regarding it as a centered set, rather than a bounded one. In other words, we’d create a core set of beliefs, but allow for diversity of opinion on matters that aren’t in the core. The focus would be on the center, rather than on patrolling the edges, and broadly speaking, Jesus is our center.* The second part of the proposal embraced a covenental model of membership. Our core set of beliefs become the basis for our covenant with each other. Individuals who embrace the core beliefs are free to sign the covenant and enter into membership. And we’d annually reaffirm our covenant with each other. I’ve been in congregations with this membership model before, and I think that there are a lot of positives involved.

* For simplicity sake, I’m leaving out the details. But if you’re interested in discussing them privately, let me know.

Despite widespread support for this solution, we did not have consensus at our September meeting. And to be honest, I left that meeting doubtful that we could reach consensus in a short amount of time. And yet, we had a tentative plan in place to formalize this plan at our October meeting. We had a fallback option if consensus couldn’t be reached (which consisted of a traditional vote, with various percentages of approval needed depending on the exact proposal), but in my gut I was feeling tense. I could imagine many ways in which a vote could go badly, creating more pain and division like two years ago. And I didn’t see a clear path toward full consensus.

So I waited. And prayed. As did the whole congregation. The team from our congregation that is leading the discernment with KIPCOR worked on modifying and improving things. And I was still tense when our next meeting began today.

But when the facilitators from KIPCOR tested the proposal for the first time today, we had reached consensus.

You could hear an audible gasp from the congregation.

And then they worked on improving things, and the consensus got even stronger: twos became threes became fours became fives.

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I’ll end my story for now, but the story is far from being finished…

• Are we an “open and affirming” congregation? No. That would have been my ideal, but I also know that my ideal would rip apart the congregation right now. We’ve taken the “open and affirming” language off the table. But we will welcome anyone who is moving toward the center – toward Jesus. We are a group that has somehow found a way to stay together despite our differences.
• Are all of the hurts healed? Not by a long shot. In my mind, this is where we may have the most work to do. The congregation has had some success in healing its own hurts, but some remain. And I think that we have much to do in order to be reconciled with people who have left the congregation permanently.
• Do we know how this new covenant model will work? Nope. But since I’m on our congregation’s ministry team, I’ll be working on this quite a bit in the next few months. But we are moving in that direction together with a lot of hope.

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It has been said that “if the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is ‘thank you’, it will be enough.”

Thank you.

Experiments in dealing with anger

A few weeks ago, I introduced Mark Scandrette’s book, Practicing the Way of Jesus. Since then, my congregation has decided to orient its fall worship around the idea of experimental discipleship that Scandrette describes in his book. (To be honest, I’m still in the process of reading through it – plodding along at my typical book reading speed.) The scriptural focus for our worship is Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. Each week, we consider one aspect of the Sermon (e.g. prayer, lust and wholeness, fasting, etc.); a team of six of us is brainstorming experiments that the congregation can choose to join; and we have a class during the education hour to help us dig more deeply into the sermon and the experiments.

Last Sunday, we began our series by considering Jesus’ words on anger and reconciliation:

You have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, “You shall not murder”; and “whoever murders shall be liable to judgement.” But I say to you that if you are angry with a brother or sister, you will be liable to judgement; and if you insult a brother or sister, you will be liable to the council; and if you say, “You fool”, you will be liable to the hell of fire. So when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift. Come to terms quickly with your accuser while you are on the way to court with him, or your accuser may hand you over to the judge, and the judge to the guard, and you will be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will never get out until you have paid the last penny.

Matthew 5.21-26, NRSV

Now I don’t think I that I have a huge problem with anger. I might get annoyed at something, but I don’t tend to remember my annoyance for very long. I don’t carry grudges. There isn’t anyone that I’m mad at right now. So I wasn’t sure what experiment I’d try this week…

Then I thought about how my anger affects others.

Oops.

When I do get angry, what I say can become harsh and biting. And loud. And it does so rather quickly.

Most people don’t get to see this side of me. It’s pretty well hidden. But my family does. Especially my children. And especially when they’re frustrating me – that is, when they’re acting like, well… children. It’s not that I shouldn’t be a parent, but I should be a parent gently. I can immediately tell when I’ve failed at this.

So… this week, I decided to do this experiment, which is one of those given to my congregation (with slight modifications):

1) When I get frustrated with my children, I will walk to where they are and speak to them face-to-face using a normal voice. I will go to where they are, because it’s harder to raise your voice when you’re standing beside someone.

2) If I mess up and hurt them with my words, I’ll do my best to apologize immediately.

3) I’ll check in with my wife, who will keep me accountable.

Since I know that my girls (at least the older two) are paying attention to these experiments, I thought I’d ask them what they thought. Is this a good experiment for me? When I get angry, do I yell too much? Do I make them sad?

There was a chorus of ‘yes’ around the kitchen table. Ordinary Spouse smirked.

Uh, thanks. You didn’t have to be so enthusiastic.

I guess I picked the right experiment.

Introducing “Practicing the Way of Jesus” by Mark Scandrette

I have a friend who struggles with some of the same faith-related angst that I have. We have been trying (with limited success) to figure out ways to discuss these things and live faithfully. This past summer, her family attended the Wild Goose Festival in North Carolina, where she heard Mark Scandrette talk about a very hands-on approach to spiritual formation and Christian discipleship. As a result, she suggested that we might start reading and discussing his new book, Practicing the Way of Jesus: Life Together in the Kingdom of Love. I happened to mention this to one of our congregation’s pastors, and now we might have a fall sermon series related to ideas in the book. Apparently, there is a hunger that is spreading.

In any case, I mention all of this by way of introduction, since I want to blog on some of the questions Mark asks in his book. And if you care to know more about it, here’s Christine Sine’s review and a Mark’s video introduction:

Ideas for worship… a call to worship

I am a member of a dispersed congregation. When we get together on Sundays, we’re anxious to catch up on everything that is happening. The downside of this is that our sanctuary is often a noisy place before the service, which distracts us from quieting ourselves before God.

We’ve started to use an audible tone to remind the congregation to come to silence a few minutes before the service starts. At first, we used a singing bowl from Ten Thousand Villages:

More recently, we’ve begun to use chimes. We have a number of these, and when I ring them I usually choose two to produce a chord in the key of the opening song (because that’s just the way I am). Typically, we ring them two or three times, roughly five seconds apart.

These have worked well. If we’re so inclined (as we were on Easter), we have multiple people ringing them and/or vary the number or frequency of the times that the chimes are played. Of course, the form isn’t the important thing. We just needed to find a gentle way to call people to worship.

Ideas for worship… Easter to Pentecost visual

If you attend a Mennonite congregation, you may be using the Leader materials for the Easter to Pentecost season. (Ordinary Spouse was a part of the team that planned them!) The theme for the season is “Turn to Jesus; Go with the Spirit”. One of the members of our worship commission designed a three-foot high mobile to evoke the motion in that theme. The rings are painted with gold, orange, and red – reminding us of the connection between the resurrection and the coming of the Paraclete.

Worship ideas: Lenten hymn sing

(Proper acknowledgement: This is a good idea. But it’s not mine.)

This year, many Mennonite churches are using the theme “Becoming Human” to shape their worship services during lent. We are created in the image of God, but sin causes us to be less than human. And so, we look to Jesus as our example of how to become truly human.

In January, I attended the Lent planner at AMBS where they were sharing various ideas for worship during this season. Rebecca Slough suggested that we consider a hymn sing for one of our services. She proceeded to lead us in a selection of hymns that helped us reflect on the different ways in which we observe Jesus’ humanity.

Yesterday, I led such a service at our congregation and structured it in this way:

The Image of Jesus in the Prophets
The Image of Jesus in the Psalms
The Image of Jesus in the Gospels
The Image of Jesus on the Cross
Becoming the Image of Christ to One Another
Sent in the Image of Christ

I tried to follow the lectionary readings as closely as possible. The Old Testament reading was about David being anointed as king. I decided to replace that with a passage from Isaiah (“A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse…”). However, I kept the psalm (Psalm 23) and the gospel reading (John 9 – the blind man is healed). Each of these was included in the appropriate place, as well as one or two appropriate hymns. At various times throughout the morning, we sang a chorus entitled “¿Quién dicen que soy yo?” (Translation: “Who do you say that I am?” For you Mennos, it’s Sing the Story #51.) This song re-centered us on the theme for the morning – deepening and broadening our understanding of Jesus. (This idea also came from the Lent Planner.)

In addition to the singing and the readings, one person shared a faith story (as we’re doing every Sunday during Lent); there was a children’s story; and we had our usual time for congregational sharing. I was assisted by an incredible group of musicians whose contributions made everything flow smoothly.

This is an idea that could be used during any time of the year, but it works especially well when there is an appropriate theme (as we have now). From my biased perspective, the congregation found the service to be very meaningful.

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For better or worse, when you pick the songs, you get to choose ones that are meaningful to you. There were two yesterday that especially reflected the way I think about faith, both from the “Sing the Story” hymnal.

The first is entitled “Helpless and Hungry” (StS #26). It was written to be in conversation with the Christmas carol “What child is this?” (and to be sung in conjunction with it). So we have questions such as, “Who is this who lives with the lowly, sharing their sorrows, knowing their hunger?” And then we hear the response, “This, this is Christ the King…” Very powerful.

The second song was entitled “On The Journey to Emmaus” (StS #98). I think that what I appreciate about that song is summarized by the final line: the one “who welcomes the stranger shall welcome the Lord.”

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Now – go plan yourself a hymn sing!

Worship ideas… Advent/Christmas/Epiphany bulletin covers

Many congregations within the Mennonite Church will be using the theme of “An Unexpected Hour” during the coming Advent/Christmas/Epiphany season this year. Some of the resources provided for the season describe how we need to develop a new sense of time… to shift from our hectic, inwardly focused time to a God-focused conception of time. In keeping with some of these ideas, I created a series of bulletin covers for the six Sundays of the season.

If you find these images compelling and would like to use them, contact me. I have higher resolution versions that you’re free to have.

L to R: Advent I through Epiphany

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Image credits:

Orion nebula, alarm clock, street clock, Big Ben, wrist watch, clock radio, digital clock radio, another digital clock radio, sundial, and another wrist watch.

Worship ideas… “The Naked Anabaptist” by Stuart Murray

At the beginning of July, I became the Lay Minister of Worship in our congregation. I work with the pastors and the Worship Commission to plan our worship services, and I also serve on the Ministry Team – a sort of board of directors for our congregation. The job is both more hectic and rewarding than I would have thought.* It is hectic just because of all the details to keep in place. It is rewarding because I love my community and I’m thankful to be able to serve them this way.

* The most ironic part of this is that Ordinary Spouse was in this position before I was. You’d think that I would have known what I was getting into. Nope.

Anyway, since this role is consuming a sizeable chunk of my mental energy these days, I thought that I might share some of our worship ideas, from time to time. This blog entry is the official kick-off for that. (Kick-off, as opposed to the ‘first’. For the first, go back to lent this year and check out the bulletin covers.)

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Stuart Murray has recently released a book entitled The Naked Anabaptist. Of course, many people hear the word ‘Anabaptist’, and they think ‘Mennonite’ or ‘Amish’. (And they probably don’t think ‘naked’.) But Stuart (writing from a British perspective) wanted to ask, “What is left after you strip away all of the cultural trappings that are traditionally associated with Anabaptists?” His answer to that question has found its way into this book as a group of seven core convictions. He discusses them in a recent article in the Mennonite.

 

In my congregation, we’re using the book as the basis for an eight part series* reflecting on our faith and on Anabaptism. I think that my hope is twofold. First, given the division that the congregation has experienced in the last two years, I hope that the book provides a common focal point. Secondly, though, I hope that we find this book to be challenging. Challenging because true discipleship is always challenging, and because I think that the Mennonites have allowed some of their distinctive witness to diminish.

* If you’re doing the math and it isn’t working (seven convictions; eight-part series), it’s because we’ll be celebrating All Saints Day in the middle of the series. All Saints celebration is an important tradition in the congregation that we didn’t want to skip, so we made it part of the series. We’ll be remembering both our loved ones and our ancestors in faith who have died.

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A couple of notes:

 

1) Coincidentally, the Mennonite congregation in Metamora, Illinois, is also doing a series using this book as guidance. Michael Danner (the pastor at Metamora) always has interesting thoughts on his blog.

2) This past Sunday, our congregation looked at the resources that Anabaptists have for living in the post-Christendom era. ‘Christendom’ is the uneasy alliance between the church and state that has existed since the time of Constantine. Whenever people call the United States a “Christian nation”, they’re talking about Christendom. As a result of Christendom, Christians in this country have a number of privileges that they take for granted. Murray argues that Christendom is ending (in North America and in his native Europe), and that something else will take its place. However, we don’t yet know what that “something” is. In the meantime, we have post-Christendom.

Ironically, the American Spectator recently published an article entitled “Mennonite Takeover?” If that seems a bit far-fetched, there are others who agree with you.